I think by a month or so this matter will almost entirely erased from you memories, as do many others, but i guess at this current moment you are, sort of at peace with yourself.
i would not say that it is okay to break down or what. you are strong and should stay that way. i would recommend that you treat this as a lesson. you paid for what you thought you could get away with. you said to yourself that you should be consistent and remember last sem's grades but all i see that you have been doing nothing to maintain a level of consistency.
so you paid for it. big deal to you huh. the panic you displayed this morning was rather impressive. i am sure you will laugh at yourself eventually when this matter is no longer of such significance. but you should not make it insignificant. its rather the first time the result of laziness and procrastination has been so clearly shoved in your face. time to decide if you should make a change, or let yourself continue to sink. what you should do is clear.
i know, you tried starting. good. i think the first few days of the week was pretty awesome. i like that. continue? yes or no? you know it yourself.
you made the resolution yourself, you know what you have to do and you know the amount of time left. you have the ability to do it. you know it as well as i do. you can, you just don't want to start making that brilliant part of you visible and functionable. why not? why become someone normal when you could and can be special?
stop using your old reasons. stop letting yourself become that someone you vowed not to be at the start of the year. as usual. start making reasons for why you should not continue your old ways and make reasons for why you should let that brilliant you come out of the cocoon you created for it using laziness. there are a thousand and million and billions of them. first and foremost? mom and dad. then? yourself.
you know it don't you? you got a resolve already. do it. just, do it.
with love,
reality.
